Sometimes. Maybe. I hope.

So this is not Z birth story.
I'm sorry.
I just need to vent for a minute.
Sometimes... A lot of the time I'm not good enough.
Why can't it be possible to please everyone?
I hate that I'm not good enough. For anyone.
Not even myself.
I try and try and try.
Uh.
I... Just wish I could be good enough.
Be the person everyone wants me to be.
Which is a whole lot of people.
Maybe one day I will be.
Maybe one day they might see me as someone who is perfect the way she is.
I don't know.
I hope, I pray one day I'm good enough.

Z Baby.

He is getting some chunk finally at 7 weeks old! His birth story is going to be on the next post!

May, Baby!

It's May! We are having a baby in May!

It's crazy how fast pregnancy went...you know, besides the last two weeks or so.

We are really hoping that he decides to make his appearance this week.

I think he might be a little stubborn though.

Besides the whole baby thing, I love that the weather is getting warmer.

I love summer!

My friend Elicia took some maternity pictures of me a couple days ago.

Hopefully they turn out.

I already hate having my picture taken, but feeling huge at 9 months pregnant doesn't help the situation.

Well, here is to hoping Z baby comes within the next 6 days.

Here is his ultrasound from when I was 30 weeks.

You can't tell me those cheeks aren't sweet and chubby!

We can't wait to meet you Z!

Also, I put his crib together ALL by myself!

I think I was around 33 weeks pregnant.

I also put together his dresser, but I didn't take a picture of that.

Husband is pretty proud of me.

And probably really glad he didn't have to do it.

Hello, Goodbye- April.

So here is April for us.

A little more happened than usual.

Just a little.

We go to Cocoa Bean to get delicious frozen hot chocolate.

We have a lazy, but oh so lovable puppy.

I have had to get TWO iron IVs to get my iron up.

We went to a Jazz game and sat one row in front of Jerry Sloan and his wife as well as got to have dinner and treats at the champions club...before and during the game.

I had amazing baby showers given by my mom and my friend Heather!

Well, that's all I really got pictures of,  but my niece turned 6!

Anthony's baby niece was blessed.

I'm still pregnant.

It's fine. For now.

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Today has been slightly emotional.

It is my dads birthday!

He would have turned 55.

Still so young and I know there were still a few things he wanted to do.

Like more traveling with my mom

And maybe the rest of the family every now and then.

Watch and play with grand kids.

It does bring me comfort that he still got to be with my sweet boy before he was sent to Husband and I. I am excited to meet him and see the things Grandpa Lee taught him.

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Your girls love and miss you everyday!

The quote at the bottom of this post is something I found right after my grandpa died and thought it was perfect. Little did I know it would also fit perfectly for my sweet dad 6 months later.

My dad is not lost or gone. I know he is still around doing the work of The Lord and keeping an eye on my mom and our family. He is able to be with us through our love for him and of course our Savior! 

" For nothing loved is ever lost and he is loved so much."

2014 So Far...

I am not sure if anyone is curious as to what the Carlton Clan is up to.

If you are, i am about to tell you.

Not a whole lot...like normal.

Its 2014 and I have yet to put a word on this blog.

So, here it goes.

I mentioned in previous posts that we are re-doing our kitchen.

It is done, except painting the door.

I love how it turned out!

We painted the babys room, i also loved how it turned out.

We just have to get the crib in there and a few little decor items and he should be set to move in.

I have about 11 weeks left until he is due to arrive and i am getting pretty anxious about it.

Anxiously excited that is.

Husband and I went on a cruise at the end of January with some of our friends, it was a BLAST.

I was a little nervous about going and being noticeably pregnant, but it all worked out.

It was our last trip before sweet baby comes.

The beaches were AMAZING.

We went to..

Cozumel, Mexico

Roatan, Honduras

and Belize.

I just need to say that if you can ever go to Roatan, do it!

The beach and water color was so BEAUTIFUL!

We had lots of fun and relaxation, oh and a lot of food and ice cream!

When we got back, my mother in law had a little baby shower for me, my sister in law and cousin in law. It was super cute and super fun...Its crazy how much stuff a baby needs and how much stuff we still need to get!

Husbands sister had her baby almost two weeks ago an his cousin is due any day now.

so it should be fun with all these babies in the family!

Valentines Day was basically just another day around our house.

I got Husband a few little prizes and treats, including the Sweet Tooth Fairy! YUM!

Seriously, try their sugar cookies. Delicious!

I told husband i did not need anything this year...

We did got to Texas Road House the next day though.

I also had to do my glucose tolerance test on Valentines Day, that was fun.

Getting blood drawn is not my idea of a way to celebrate Valentines, but i guess thats what it was..

Happy Valentines Day to me!

but I did pass!! Woohoo!

Well I think thats about it, exciting i know...

until next time.

Peace.

Holiday Happenings.

It is the day before Christmas and i have not updated this thing since we found out what we were having!

That is not good!

I do not have a lot of picture of really anything that has been going on.

We have been re-doing our kitchen with my mom!

it is looking so good I am so excited to show it!

There has not been much remodeling as in ripping things out, mostly just painting and adding a few things.

It is almost complete.

I also got new decorations for my Christmas tree this year!

It is Grinch themed!

I love the Grinch.

Which i have been watching plenty of this Holiday season!

Sako also loved the stuffed Grinchs that i put on the tree that he knocked it over!

that was not fun!

It was one HUGE mess!

If anyone is interested...

I am just over 20 weeks and feeling good!

I feel as though i cant complain.

I have heard horror stories about pregnancies with morning sickness and things and I am SO thankful that none of that happened to me.

Baby Z has made his appearance!

and we can feel him move! so precious!

My parents also had their 33rd wedding anniversary on the 19th of December!

It was a bittersweet day for me and i am sure the rest of my family, especially my cute mommy!

its bitter because my dad is not here, but so sweet that we can still celebrate their marriage!

They have been sealed for all time and eternity and that is very sweet!

I am so glad that their marriage did not end the day my dad passed away.

This has been a very different Christmas and Holiday season without him around.

I was having an emotional day a couple weeks ago and sweet Husband turned on Mickey Mouses Christmas for us to watch, cute huh?

How can that not cheer someone up?

But when Donald Duck came on I just bawled my little eyes out...

My dad use to do his voice so good.

All growing up to make me smile or laugh he would do that voice.

So i must say being pregnant and missing my dad is not a good combination a lot of the time.

ok. 

Brighter note.

I have a couple pictures.

If i can get them to upload.

Enjoy.

Just my tree and when it got knocked over.